I feel like I’m stuck. There are so many things I would like to develop and study, work or make. There’s too many things I want to do to fit in one lifetime. I need an extra one. On top of that, this week hasn’t been the best week. I feel tired, useless and lonely. This only increases the wondering about my life and what to do with it.
1. I love languages. I’d really love to do a little more with English. I honestly love speaking it, so I’m thrilled that I have an English class this period. Last week, we had to do a presentation and the comments were; “Good pronounciation, fluent”. I even got a smiley! And because the teacher is English as well… She probably know what she’s talking about. These little things and comments, make me really proud of myself. For actually being good at something I like.
2. I love psychology. I really wish I could help people in school. On the social level. Of course, I do make little fun of them, but I should really talk to a girl in my group about how nobody ever wants to form a couple with her. She told one of my friends that this also happened throughout high school. I can not imagine how lonely she must feel some times. I really wish I could help her out and let her make more friends, come off more social and stuff like this. This is somehow ironic because I’m studying to work at a forensic laboratory. My workfield with people will be just co-workers and (dead) body samples.
3. I love acting. And singing, secretly. I really wish I could be in a movie or something. Lately, a friend and I started taking acting classes but this is mostly improvisation and ‘games’. Also it’s only 10 classes and pretty expensive… I’d love to do a production next year, but paying 400 euros for performing something seems ridiculous to me.
I think the only appropriate job for me is to be a psychiatrist in a Hollywood movie. (Don’t mind me, taking impossible dreams to a whole new level).
Also lately, I’ve started to realise I really like what I study. I’m good at it (as long as I don’t have to do maths). And people (including me) finally take me seriously. Well… Most of the time.